(OPENING THEME PLAYING)
Yay!
You guys see that sporting
event last night?
You know I did!
My team scored all the points!
(CROWD CHEERING)
Hey, hey!
What about that race car we
saw yesterday, huh?
It was all like...
(IMITATING CAR)
No, bro, it was like...
(SCREAMING)
(CHUCKLES) Oh, man.
Guys, hold up! Shh!
(LAUGHING)
-Oh man, that one stunk!
-Speak too, Cyborg.
This is so annoying.
-(CYBORG BELCHES)
-(GRUNTS)
Ooh! They are giving me
the aches of the head.
We're being such boys right
now and I love it!
Boys! Boys! Boys! Boys!
(BEATBOXING)
B...b...b... Boys.
Boys.
B...b...b... Boys.
B...b...b...
Boys, in your face!
Quiet!
Uh, what's her problem?
I'll tell you her problem.
She's a "her",
you know, a girl.
That's right. She wishes
she could be a boy...
-(ALL BURP)
-But she can't.
Why would we wish
to be the boys?
Because of one simple fact.
Boys are better than girls!
(SEAL BARKING)
How can one say
one gender is
superior to the other?
Well, Starfire,
(CLEARS THROAT)
if you ever took the knowledge
train down town to the corner
of Science and Fact,
you'd know girls
can never compete with boys,
because they're too busy lying
around, thinking about how
they look and being emotional.
(SOBBING)
Uh, lying around?
You're the ones who are lazy!
And you spend much more time
on your hair appearance
than do we.
And if you're going
to bring up emotional...
Stop yelling at us!
(BOTH SOBBING)
Oh, my self-esteem.
Still think boys are better?
Of course they are!
In fact, I could go on and on
about all the reasons girls
are worse than boys,
but I'm going to sum it up
in just one word...
Cooties!
(ALL GASP)
You're crawling with them!
We don't want your cooties!
As you can see from this
chart, created by a boy,
science tells us that there is
no evidence in girls
of sugar, spice
or anything nice.
What there is, is cooties!
Oh, gross!
Gross indeed, Beast Boy.
I rest my case.
(GASPS) I have the cooties?
No, you don't.
Cooties aren't real.
If boys are so much better,
then prove it.
We challenge you to a contest,
Boys vs. Girls.
(WHISPERING)
Very well.
Okay, 10 laps
around the island.
I wish you the luck
that is good, Beast Boy.
You're going down, girl!
It's cheetah time!
On your mark, get set...
(PANTING)
What took you so long?
First one to solve this
complex math equation wins.
You're going down!
(MUMBLING)
Don't forget the factor...
RAVEN: Done!
(TITANS STRUGGLING)
Dig deep!
Be the future!
-(YELLING)
-(GRUNTING)
The pull!
Come on, Star, we got this.
(BEAST BOY CHUCKLES)
(BOYS SCREAMING)
Well, girls win.
Dude, you lied to us!
Girls are better than boys!
Yeah, boys are terrible.
From now on, we're girls!
-Yeah!
-(STAMMERING) Whoa!
But what about the cooties?
Don't worry, girls,
he lied about that too.
You look cootie free to me.
So, girls, you see that
sporting event...
Uh, I mean, um,
did you guys...
Argh... What...
What exactly do you two
do anyway?
Yeah, come to think of it,
what do you girls do?
Well, you know,
I read from my spell book...
While fighting an evil demon!
-(CHUCKLES)
-You get 'em, girl!
-Oh, man! Epic!
-Get 'em, that's my girl!
What about you, Star?
Well, I make
glordnorb pudding,
with the saliva
of a giant klatar!
Oh-ho-ho!
I love giant klatars!
RAVEN: That's how we roll.
Cootie free!
We'll see about that.
All right, you dirty cooties,
do your thing!
(EVIL LAUGHTER)
CYBORG: Hey!
I'm trying to sleep!
Sorry.
(CONTINUES LAUGHING)
CYBORG: I can still hear you.
-Still?
-Yes.
Ugh, a boy!
Ew! He smells.
So, you boys
enjoying being girls?
-It's the best!
-Girls rule!
Girls! Girls! Girls! Girls!
Are you done?
(BEATBOXING)
G...g...g...g... Girls!
Girls! Girls!
G...g...g...g... Girls!
Something wrong?
I do not feel alone
in my clothes.
Yeah, my skin is crawling.
Ooh, tsk-tsk-tsk.
Hmm, you know
what that sounds like.
(YELPS)
-Cooties?
-(BOTH SCREAMING)
They're real! They're real!
We do not have the cooties!
-Oh!
-It's true,
girls have cooties!
We want to be boys again!
You did this to us!
Yes!
And I can undo it, with this!
It's a cootie catcher.
Oh, please,
give us the catcher
of the cooties!
I'll be happy to,
if you admit
that boys are better
than girls.
Never!
Then you're stuck
with cooties!
You know, all we have to do
is touch you and you'll have
cooties too!
Ahhh, cooties!
But, Starfire touching me...
Ahhh, cooties!
Or the start
of a beautiful relationship.
Ahhh, cooties! Run!
(PANTING)
Think we lost them?
-Impossible!
-(ALL GASP)
We have more of the endurance.
Psst...
(ALL SCREAM)
Follow me, I know a place
they'll never find us.
BEAST BOY: Shh!
We'll be safe in here.
CYBORG: Ugh, safe, you know,
'cause we're in one.
-RAVEN: We're smarter too!
-(ALL SCREAM)
(CRASHING)
And we are the stronger.
(SCREAMING)
Now everyone
is having the cootie.
So, you've got no choice
but to use the cootie catcher.
You win. Again!
And now the cooties
are caught.
(GULPING)
(SIGHS) I am alone
in my clothes once more.
Let's face it guys, the girls
are better than us.
They're stronger,
faster, smarter.
They're our superiors
in every way.
We shouldn't let a day go by
without thanking them for even
noticing that we're alive.
On behalf of all boys,
I want to apologize
for our actions.
-Thank you, Robin.
-It's cool.
But you know what, Robin?
Only a boy can make
such an amazing speech!
Boys rule!
B...b...b... Boys!
Please stop!
(SNEEZES)
Sorry you're
feeling sick, bro.
Hopefully, this
soup will help.
This should keep
you nice and warm.
And I have prepared
the ceremonial sword for
your end-of-life ritual.
-Please extend your neck.
-(SCREAMING)
It's just a cold, Star!
I'll be better in a few days.
ROBIN: This is
no cold, Cyborg!
I've seen this before.
A virus has invaded your body!
And it's destroying
you from the inside out.
You are dying!
This is awesome!
-Yeah, why?
-Body Adventure!
That's why.
It's every superhero's dream
to shrink down to the size of
a germ and to explore
the miracle of the body.
That ain't my dream.
-Yeah, gross!
-Think about it.
ROBIN: Surfing on blood cells,
climbing a rib cage,
swimming in the stomach,
I'll take down those
viruses, mano-a-germo!
(GRUNTS) Hyah! You know...
Body Adventure!
Sorry, you aren't
crawling all up in this.
It's just a cold!
And it's going to kill you,
Cyborg! Maybe!
(SCREAMING) Panic!
You can't go
inside him, Robin.
It's not like we have a...
"Brand new shrink
ray I just bought"?
(POWERING DOWN)
Uh, dude, are
you sure it's new?
Yeah, they don't sell junk
at the swap meet.
Now, stand aside!
Body Adventure!
Robin, are you not supposed
to be much smaller?
I think that's
as far as it goes.
Huh, no problem.
This can still work.
(ROBIN GRUNTING)
Cyborg, open wide!
-(METAL CLANGING)
-ROBIN: Body Adventure!
-(CHOKING)
-Do not worry, Cyborg,
I shall maneuver
your Heimlich.
-(CYBORG SCREAMING)
-(ROBIN SCREAMING)
Oh, no, is the ray of
shrinking broken?
Looks like it.
Then Robin's stuck as a baby?
Oh, it's okay, my baby-waby.
Our li'l coco-moco-chucka...
Ow!
Bad baby! Bad!
Okay, Titans, change of plans!
Body Adventure is canceled,
but Operation
Big World is a go!
Whoo-hoo! Everything's huge!
This is awesome!
I am so hungry,
one pizza won't be enough!
And while you starve, I'll
live for an entire week on
this single topping.
(MUNCHING)
How am I going
to finish this all?
The food just keeps coming.
I am stuffed.
-(ROBIN WHOOPING)
-(GROANS)
-Whoo-hoo! Silky Horse!
-(NEIGHING)
(GROANS)
(SQUEALS) Robin!
Oh, I did not see you enter.
Exactly!
Being tiny really increases my
ninja stealth skills.
What's that behind your ear?
(GASPS) It's me!
I can be anywhere at any time
and you would never know.
Anyway, just pretend
I'm not here.
-Can't seem
to shake this cold.
-(SQUISHING)
I stepped on tiny Robin!
No, you stepped
on my cherry tomato!
Now what am I going to
use as a bowling ball?
Dude, we need to talk!
-(SNEEZING)
-(ROBIN YELPING)
Sounds like your cold
is getting worse.
Just say the word
and I'll write you
a prescription for a...
Body Adventure.
Stop with the Body Adventure!
My body is not
an adventure to be had!
-We think you should unshrink
yourself, Robin.
-Indeed,
I feel like I am being
watched wherever I go.
And I'm just not ready to
be a father yet.
No way!
Being tiny is awesome!
Check this out.
I made a mountain
out of flour and these
carrot sticks are my skis.
Whoo-hoo!
And, if you think that's cool,
check out my new boomerang.
I made it out of a toenail.
-(EXCLAIMS)
-ALL: UGH!
That's it!
If you're going to stay small,
you cannot be our leader!
-ROBIN: What?
-We're big people dealing with
big problems.
We need you up here.
Now what do you say?
(SHRIEKING)
Never! I love my tiny life!
(NEIGHING)
Silky Horse!
What are you doing?
I've decided to shrink the
entire team.
-But the ray is broken.
-Not anymore.
I was able to fix and improve
it with my tiny hands.
Let's do it! Tiny Titans, go!
(EXCLAIMS)
Now enough of this (SNEEZES)
shrinking nonsense! (SNEEZES)
It's time to... (SNEEZES)
(EXCLAIMING)
(BEEPING)
(SCREAMING)
What happened to my body?
The virus has
gotten so bad that it's shut
down all your systems.
Exactly like I told
you it would.
We're going to need more soup.
Or, you know, real medicine.
No, it's already too late.
We only have one option.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
Body Adventure!
Where are we?
Looks like we're
lost in the carpet.
Not for long.
Let's climb something tall to
get our bearings.
(ROBIN PANTING)
Ooh, that looks kinda far.
Perhaps we should have gotten
closer to my body first.
(BEAST BOY MUNCHING)
-(SCREECHING)
-(ALL SCREAMING)
Oh, hey, it's Jerry,
my favorite flea.
Flea you later, Jerry.
STARFIRE: We have not moved
but a few inches closer.
We're never going to make it.
I'm going to die here,
sick, tiny and alone.
Not on my tiny watch.
I have an ace up my sleeve.
(ROARS)
Silky Horse!
(ALARM CHIRPS)
We finally made it!
Body Adventure!
Ah!
BEAST BOY: Oh!
Wow!
Where are we?
Ugh, I think it's the stomach.
(SHUDDERING)
Whoa, this is most unpleasant.
Come on, this is great.
Who wants to surf
this hot dog?
Easy! Ugh!
This is... This is fun...
(RETCHING)
Like a big old swimming pool.
(GRUNTS) Body Adventure.
(RETCHES)
Yuck.
Oh, well...
Aah, that tastes gross!
(EXCLAIMING)
There's more fun
to be had in the body.
Follow me!
-(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)
-Body Adventure!
Hmm... Where to next?
I know, let's hit the rib cage
for some awesome climbing.
Would not the virus most
likely inhabit his air sacks?
Yeah, probably.
Fine!
BEAST BOY: Ugh! It's so slimy!
Ugh, it's like you were
inhaling jelly, Cyborg.
(WHOOPING)
So fun!
Mucus vines!
Don't do that!
It tickles. (LAUGHING)
(CYBORG COUGHING)
(COUGHING) Oh, gross!
(WHINING) I need a shower!
Okay, Robin, maybe we should
just take Cyborg to a doctor.
No, we came in here to fight
some viruses in
an awesome showdown
and that's what we're
going to do.
-Look, there's one now!
-What's up, guys?
(WHEEZES)
Titans, go!
-I would rather the not.
-I am not touching that thing.
-Gross, dude!
-Uh, no thanks.
(YELLING)
(RETCHING)
Everything in this body is
sticky and smelly and weird.
I thought a Body
Adventure would be
awesome but it's just gross!
Come on, let's
get out of here.
I'll just be over here,
inflaming some membranes
and spreading
mucus and what have you.
How do we save
poor Cyborg now?
-STARFIRE: Oh.
-RAVEN: Ugh.
Maybe try calling a doctor!
-Fine!
-Azarath Metrion Zinthos.
(KEYPAD DIAL)
-(DIAL TONE)
-WOMAN: 911,
what's your emergency?
-RAVEN: You got to help us.
-(GARBLED SPEECH)
What?
-(GARBLED SPEECH)
-Sorry, I can't
understand you.
Is this some kind of joke?
RAVEN: No, no, no, no, no,
don't hang up!
(DIAL TONE)